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	<title>Delusioned &#187; Humor</title>
	<atom:link href="http://www.delusioned.net/category/delusioned/humor/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://www.delusioned.net</link>
	<description>Diluted by the illusion of others.</description>
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			<item>
		<title>Intelligence&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2008/02/11/intelligence/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2008/02/11/intelligence/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 Feb 2008 19:02:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2008/02/11/intelligence/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ Solving the world&#8217;s stupidity one bright idea at a time.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p align="left"><a href="http://www.delusioned.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/pool.jpeg" title="Bright idea …"><img src="http://www.delusioned.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/pool.thumbnail.jpeg" alt="Bright idea …" /></a> Solving the world&#8217;s stupidity one bright idea at a time.</p>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The new Table from Microsoft.</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/21/the-new-table-from-microsoft/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/21/the-new-table-from-microsoft/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Jun 2007 16:53:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/21/the-new-table-from-microsoft/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Meet the Microsoft Surface, a $10,000 big ass table:
[youtube]CZrr7AZ9nCY[/youtube]
Apple should worry&#8230;
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Meet the Microsoft Surface, a $10,000 big ass table:</p>
<p>[youtube]CZrr7AZ9nCY[/youtube]</p>
<p>Apple should worry&#8230;</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>You know you&#8217;re an American..</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/12/you-know-youre-an-american/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/12/you-know-youre-an-american/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 12 Jun 2007 16:10:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/12/you-know-youre-an-american/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[  
You know you&#8217;re an American if when you view a world map the first thing you see is this.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="float: right; margin-left: 10px; margin-bottom: 10px">  <a href="http://www.doheth.co.uk/funny/misc/US_World" title="photo sharing"><img src="http://www.doheth.co.uk/funny/gallery/misc/US_World.jpg" height="150" width="250" /></a></p>
<p>You know you&#8217;re an American if when you view a world map the first thing you see is <a href="http://www.doheth.co.uk/funny/misc/US_World">this</a>.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>New Apple Product: iRack</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/01/new-apple-product-irack/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/01/new-apple-product-irack/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 01 Jun 2007 19:22:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Apple]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Videos]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/06/01/new-apple-product-irack/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The new Apple product, with a message, given to you by MadTV: The Apple iRack
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The new Apple product, with a message, given to you by MadTV: <a href="http://www.glumbert.com/media/irack">The Apple iRack</a></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Karma at its finest.</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/23/karma-at-its-finest/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/23/karma-at-its-finest/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 May 2007 15:19:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/23/karma-at-its-finest/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Take a train, parked car and an argument with your girlfriend and you have attempted murder. Unfortunately, for this poor sap, this attempted murder turned out to be an odd twist of irony.
In USA, a man attempted to kill his girlfriend by parking his car on the tracks and jumping out of the car when [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Take a train, parked car and an argument with your girlfriend and you have attempted murder. Unfortunately, for this poor sap, this attempted murder turned out to be an odd twist of irony.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2007-05-21-train-attempted-murder_N.htm">In USA, a man attempted to kill his girlfriend</a> by parking his car on the tracks and jumping out of the car when they were arguing. As you would expect, the train did hit the car, but unlike the movies there was no huge explosion. Instead, the car flew off the tracks, hitting the man as he attempted to flee the scen, killing him instantly. His girlfriend was admitted to the hospital and is expected to live.</p>
<p>On one sense, this is karma taken its toll; in another, it&#8217;s Darwin at its peek. Either way, it is pretty funny and a well deserved end for the guy. I am not one to promote death, but I do believe if you take a life, you deserve to give yours up.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Time is going really, really, slow&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/22/time-is-going-really-really-slow/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/22/time-is-going-really-really-slow/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 May 2007 17:10:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Reality]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/22/time-is-going-really-really-slow/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is great. I don&#8217;t smoke marijuana, nor have I ever tried it, but I at least know you cannot over dose on that stuff.
If I know this, you would think a cop would, too. And lets not forget the fact that this cop openly admitted to confiscating the dope and cooking it within brownies. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This is great. I don&#8217;t smoke marijuana, nor have I ever tried it, but I at least know you cannot over dose on that stuff.</p>
<p>If I know this, you would think a cop would, too. And lets not forget the fact that this cop openly admitted to confiscating the dope and cooking it within brownies. Priceless.</p>
<p>News report of the incident:</p>
<blockquote style="text-align: center"><p>[youtube]hnZb5wi_jsU[/youtube]<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrZLc9lqQM0">911 call in its entirety</a></p></blockquote>
<p><span id="more-67"></span><br />
After the hilarity of the incident, there is one thing that bothers me. I am not one to smoke marijuana, but I do know very well it happens to be a lot safer for you than drinking or smoking cigarettes. Lets ignore the fact that it is illegal for no apparent reason and focus on the punishment this cop was given.</p>
<p>If he was an average Joe Smoe on the streets, he and his wife would have been arrested and put into jail for at least 30 days for possession of marijuana. If Joe also admitted to stealing the package, his time may have been greater &#8212; or at least with greater fines.</p>
<p>Now, I don&#8217;t mind the punishment the cop received. What I  don&#8217;t like his how everybody else is not let off as easily. What his wife received, a slap on the wrist (if that), should be the same punishment everybody should receive. After all, marijuana is less harmful than smoking cigarettes. Our drug use policy in the US is so as backwards, it is unreal. People should have free choice to screw their bodies up if they want to. We also should not take on so much compassion for somebody that consciously chooses to screw themselves up. It&#8217;s nothing but a waste of time and money.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Robber with unloaded gun killed by loaded gun</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/22/robber-with-unloaded-gun-killed-by-loaded-gun/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/22/robber-with-unloaded-gun-killed-by-loaded-gun/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 May 2007 16:47:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/22/robber-with-unloaded-gun-killed-by-loaded-gun/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Darwin at its finest!
A robbery and crime spree aided by an unloaded gun came to a halt late Thursday when the gunman met more than his match: a gun with bullets.
Charles Parker Jr., 18, of Detroit was killed when a 53-year-old man pulled out a 9mm handgun and shot the teen, who was armed with [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Darwin at its finest!</p>
<blockquote><p><em>A robbery and crime spree aided by an unloaded gun came to a halt late Thursday when the gunman met more than his match: a gun with bullets.</em></p>
<p><em>Charles Parker Jr., 18, of Detroit was killed when a 53-year-old man pulled out a 9mm handgun and shot the teen, who was armed with an unloaded .22-caliber handgun.</em></p></blockquote>
<p><a href="http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070519/NEWS01/705190372">This is what dreams are made of&#8230;</a></p>
<p>Word of note to all you would be robbers; don&#8217;t walk the walk unless you&#8217;re prepared to take the chance.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>I CAN HAS CHEEZBURGER?</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/09/i-can-has-cheezburger/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/09/i-can-has-cheezburger/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 09 May 2007 19:52:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Delusioned]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/05/09/i-can-has-cheezburger/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A site for any cat lover.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://icanhascheezburger.com/">A site for any cat lover</a>.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>A spider widget!</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/03/19/a-spider-widget/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/03/19/a-spider-widget/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Mar 2007 19:08:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Delusioned]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/03/19/spider-walking-across-your-screen/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is cool; a Google, Netvibes, etc, shockwave widget showing a spider walking across your screen. Without a mouse in view, it&#8217;ll randomly walk across. With a mouse, it&#8217;ll follow it around. It&#8217;s a definite must have for anybody suffering from arachnophobia: aBowman.com » Spider

I&#8217;ve named mine Bob.
You can even get it for your webpage [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This is cool; a Google, Netvibes, etc, shockwave widget showing a spider walking across your screen. Without a mouse in view, it&#8217;ll randomly walk across. With a mouse, it&#8217;ll follow it around. It&#8217;s a definite must have for anybody suffering from arachnophobia: <a href="http://abowman.com/google-modules/spider/">aBowman.com » Spider</a><br />
<span id="more-52"></span><br />
I&#8217;ve named mine Bob.</p>
<p><script src="http://gmodules.com/ig/ifr?url=http://abowman.googlepages.com/spider.xml&amp;up_spiderName=Spider&amp;up_backgroundImage=http%3A%2F%2F&amp;up_bellyColor=666666&amp;up_legColor=333333&amp;up_backgroundColor=FFFFFF&amp;up_size=1&amp;up_speed=1&amp;up_userColor1=BB3333&amp;up_userColor2=&amp;up_userColor3=&amp;up_originalLook=0&amp;synd=open&amp;w=458&amp;h=226&amp;title=Spider&amp;border=%23ffffff%7C0px%2C1px+solid+%23004488%7C0px%2C1px+solid+%23005599%7C0px%2C1px+solid+%230077BB%7C0px%2C1px+solid+%230088CC&amp;output=js"></script>You can even get it for your webpage through a <a href="http://gmodules.com/ig/creator?url=http://abowman.googlepages.com/spider.xml&amp;synd=open&amp;w=300&amp;h=200&amp;title=Spider&amp;border=%23ffffff%7C3px%2C1px+solid+%23999999">Google web page configuration</a>.</p>
<p>Now, if can only get the Google Desktop widget to allow the spider to walk the whole screen, I&#8217;d install it on my work PC.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>How to sell a Zune</title>
		<link>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/02/08/to-buy-a-zune/</link>
		<comments>http://www.delusioned.net/2007/02/08/to-buy-a-zune/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Feb 2007 17:11:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip G</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.delusioned.net/2007/02/08/to-buy-a-zune/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[How do you get people to buy a Zune? Offer them a free iTunes Gift Card.
For those of you that don&#8217;t understand the irony in this one; Zune is a direct competitor to the iPod, including having their own music store which is not compatible with the iPod, nor is iTunes compatible with the MS [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How do you get people to buy a Zune? <a href="http://forums.macrumors.com/showthread.php?t=277578">Offer them a free iTunes Gift Card</a>.</p>
<p>For those of you that don&#8217;t understand the irony in this one; Zune is a direct competitor to the iPod, including having their own music store which is not compatible with the iPod, nor is iTunes compatible with the MS Zune.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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